Tag: Thoughts paper

• Sleeping In, Addictions, and Being a Control Freak – Thoughts from February 24, 2025

  

  The best way to start this Thoughts paper is just to start it. I have many things I want to talk about, but don’t know where to begin. The ongoing saga of working on the house continues. I have a few pieces of trim to fix, but we’re down to just finishing the painting. The…

  Brian Kirwan

  December 23, 2025

  Uncategorized

  2024, addiction, alcoholics, Alcoholics Anonymous, belief in a higher power, Christian based organization, cigarette pack, completist, craving sugar, dad smoked, denial, drinking too much, fixing the trim, flood of emotions, holding them to get through cravings, I’m an atheist, illicit drugs, meetings held in churches, mental health, mentionaing God, mini vacation, Narcotics Anonymous, nerds, non-religious, non-religious programs for addiction recovery, not in control, painting, Patti, proof of denial, pure sugar, sleeping late, smoking, social drinker, substance take control, sugar addiction, thinking clearly, thoughts, Thoughts paper, too much of a control freak, under the influence of a substance, weight goes up, working on the house

• New Years, Old Jobs, and The Wedding Song – Thoughts from December 29, 2024 to January 26, 2025

  

  December 29, 2024 The year is ending in two days. There are several things I’m looking forward to in 2025. My last loan payment will be at the end of February. In March, I’ll have been at Disney for 20 years. That will mean my vacation and sick time earned will go up. When I…

  Brian Kirwan

  December 9, 2025

  Uncategorized

  2024, 2025, all we need is time, allergies, allergy to wheat, artificial intelligence, artificial singers, backup singers, being busy, building the shed, cats, consequences, creating a harmony, Disney for 20 years, disposing old shed, electric guitar, extended deadline, fixing the house, food allergies, four cats, future note, general scratchy feeling in my throat, giant chocolate chip cookie, June 14 1997, lifetime pass to Disneyland, looking forward, lyrics, married, meatball sandwiches, mobile home, my AI voice could sing, no downtime, no more wheat, Patti, reality, recorded main voice, retirement, retiring, singing, strangers around the house, The Wedding Song, thoughts, Thoughts paper, throat problems, tired, wedding march, working on song

• Memories of Route 66, Anxieties, and Word Choices – Thoughts from October 12 and 20, 2024

  

  October 12, 2024 I haven’t written a Thoughts paper in a while. Actually, that’s not true. Why am I lying to you? Because I can. I should say I haven’t written anything unplanned. Patti and I took a Route 66 trip that I wrote about, but I didn’t write the entries on the date I…

  Brian Kirwan

  October 14, 2025

  Uncategorized

  2024, a picture is worth a thousand words, airports, anxiety, anxious thoughts, arbitrary word choices, awkward, Couples Sans Souci, damaged emotions, dash cam, dash cam footage, easily triggered anxiety, electric bill, emotions, financial crisis, flying in a plane, heat of summer, images lead to memories, Jamaica, knowledge always wins over belief, only flying first class, Patti, Petrified Forest, realizing my error, Route 66 trip, snobbish rule, taking pictures, taking pictures throughout the day, thoughts, Thoughts paper, visual thinking, Wordscapes, wounded emotions, writing

• Creativity and Shyness – Thoughts from August 19 and 31, 2024

  

  August 19, 2024 I’ve talked with several people about my throat. I told them about the polyp on my vocal cords. The singer I talked to said she has had them on her vocal cords. She had them removed with surgery. A former nurse said trying the dietary changes made sense before going right for…

  Brian Kirwan

  July 29, 2025

  Uncategorized

  2024, animations, autism, autobiographies, balsa wood, being gay, being shy, building things, creating candles, creating crap, creating songs, creative pursuits, creative skills, depression, dietary changes, drawings, encouraging environment, encouraging parents, encouraging people, experimental ideas, hippies, introduced myself, LGBTQ, musical creations, new person at work, new situations, painting ceramics, polyp on my vocal cord, shyness bubble, signs of autism, singing, singing too much, surgery, thinking is my favorite hobby, thoughts, Thoughts paper, throat problems, vocal cords, Wordscapes, Wordscapes tournament, writing, writings

• Politics and Route 66 Trips – Thoughts from August 4, 2024

  

  August 4, 2024 This is going to be a different kind of Thoughts paper. These might look like the regular words I use, but don’t be fooled. I’m writing them under a change tree. What’s a change tree? It’s the tree of change, of course. I’ve never been a fan of change. It always comes…

  Brian Kirwan

  July 8, 2025

  Uncategorized

  2020 election, 2024, anxiety, being liberal, birthday, caring about others, change, complaining, conservative, conversation, enough old white men in politics, interrupted routines, it is not perfect but nothing is, itinerary of the trip, Joe Biden, Kamala Harris, liberal, looking conservative, non-religious, Patti, prepared for change, Reality Acceptance party, religious beliefs, respresent all Americans, Route 66, routines, running for President, sad and miserable people, scientific facts, talking points, thoughts, Thoughts paper, under a change tree, vacation, vice president, winging things

• Inflatable Slides, Thinking for Myself, and Smelling Others – Thoughts from July 22, 2024

  

  I saw a billboard from the freeway that was advertising an inflatable slide that you could rent for your party. The billboard was in Spanish, so I don’t know what it actually said. It made me smile because Patti was talking the other day about getting an inflatable slide in our backyard. She saw that…

  Brian Kirwan

  June 24, 2025

  Uncategorized

  2024, advertisements, billboards, body odor, boredom, choice is a privilege, disgusting smell, doing things my way, elevator smell, expressing thoughts, filling in downtime, free will, gorilla smell, inflatable slides, nerdy problems, nerdy thoughts, no pleasing me, paralyzed by choices, parties, Patti, pleasant smells, thinking about doing something, thinking for myself, thoughts, Thoughts paper, too much information, too much perfume, unexpressed thoughts, unexpressed topics, writing about indecision

• Writing Thoughts and Me – Thoughts from July 8 to 14, 2024

  

  July 8, 2024 There’s been a rumor that this is my last Thoughts paper. I just want to state for the record that I still have thoughts I write down and I don’t see an end to them anytime soon. Who started the rumor is not important. Why they started the rumor is more relevant…

  Brian Kirwan

  June 3, 2025

  Uncategorized

  2024, autobiagraphy, average height, average looks, average white man, big nose, blind without glasses, camera down my throat, curious what authors look like, deaf dumb and blind kid, deaf in one ear, ears stick out, graying hair, inner thoughts, interesting paragraphs, laughing at my flesh, life experience, living in the past, meeting expectations, midlife, motives, my surface level self, near sighted, outer appearance, paragraphs, Patti, Pete Townsend, point of living, product of the times, questioning your purpose, reading, receding hair, Roger Daltrey, rumor free, rumors, sentences, shampoo with dye, sore throat, The Who, thoughts, Thoughts from Life, Thoughts paper, throat cancer, throat problems, throat specialist, unprecedented times, wearing glasses, weight, Wordscapes, writing, you can only live in the present

• Traveling the World, Autobiographies, and Revisionist History – Thoughts from June 26 and 30, 2024

  

  June 26, 2024 Do I regret not living in a dorm, traveling the world, or living more adventurously when I was young? The rest of this Thoughts paper will explain my answer. Why am I asking this philosophical question about my possible regrets? It began when I was listening to Rebel Wilson’s autobiography. She talked…

  Brian Kirwan

  May 20, 2025

  Uncategorized

  2024, audiobooks, autobiography, being a good person, being an interesting person, being rich and famous, believing in supernatural things, California, caring about other people, coincidence, college, destiny, foreign laguages, foreigner in my own land, getting philosophical and spiritual, growing up in a small city, justifying your beliefs, living in a dorm, living outside the US, love at first sight, mono hearing, multicultural, Patti, Paul Stanley, private school, public school, Rebel Wilson, regrets, religious beliefs, religious words, revisionist history, spiritual equals religious, temporary relationships, thinking independently, thoughts, Thoughts paper, traveling the world, weird shy kid, world traveling, you can’t change the past

• Mono Hearing Part 2 – Thoughts from June 3, 2024

  

  Thinking about the subject of yesterday’s Thoughts paper, I realized I had more to say. This will be Part 2 of my discussion of the nightmare I call mono hearing. If you didn’t read yesterday’s paper, stop reading this and read that. Now that you’re back or you never left, I will continue talking about…

  Brian Kirwan

  April 15, 2025

  Uncategorized

  2024, an assault on my ear, cause of hearing loss, celebrities, celebrities with mono hearing, ear wax washed out, flushing the ear canal, getting a hearing aid, good ears, gradual decline of hearing, hearing in pain, higher register singing, loud places, mono hearing, mono hearing siblings, mountain driving, my bad ear, my good ear, noise into pain, pain in the back of my throat, pebbles in my throat, permanently raspy voice, popping ears, primary physician, referral from the doctor, singing, Sister, swimmer’s ear, thoughts, Thoughts paper, throat specialist, troublesome ear, troublesome throat, wax build up

• Mono Hearing – Thoughts from June 2, 2024

  

  I’m going to start today’s Thoughts paper with a thought about what it’s like to only hear in one ear. I noted about twenty years ago in a Thoughts paper how my hearing was declining in one ear. Over the years, I have gone from only hearing certain tones to hearing almost nothing. I was…

  Brian Kirwan

  April 8, 2025

  Uncategorized

  2024, anxiety, attractive people, autobiography, bad ear, Beatles songs, Brian, creating music, deaf in one ear, declining hearing, Halle Berry, headphones, hearing loss, hearing only in one ear, humor, ignoring my name, Is this the correct side?, knowing left from right, knowing where sounds are coming from, live events, live events are a nightmare, loud noises, mono hearing, mono hearing sucks crap through a straw, overloaded ear and brain, Patti, Paul Stanley, physically hurts me, pity attractive people, Rob Lowe, speaking quietly, Stephen Colbert, stereo music, stereo was my jam, the name Brian, the price of beauty, thoughts, Thoughts paper, walking on the left of people, you’re on my bad side