Tag: depression

• Breaking Down and Starting Over – Thoughts from February 23, 2026

  

  Let’s go back in time and relive a horrible time in my life. If that makes you want to read on, you are a sick person. For all you sick people who are still here, I need to set the scene. The following happened in about November to December 2009. When you read what happened,…

  Brian Kirwan

  September 15, 2026

  Uncategorized

  2009, 2010, 2026, anger, anxiety, anxiety and depression, anxiety medication, before Thanksgiving, being happy, dealing with my anxiety, depression, despair, dredging up old feelings, drooling, fears, financial downfall, frustration, future world of joy, giving up on everything, happier future life, homeopathic medicine and chiropractors, horrible time in my life, I needed help, I was fired, looking for work, mental health, mental health appointment, mental health issues, miserable jobs, my breakdown, nephew, not knowing what to do, Patti, psychiatrist, relive difficult emotions, reliving the worst time in my life, seeing a therapist, spiral of depression, starting over, temporary job, thoughts, Thoughts from Life, three cats, trauatic time in my life, uncontrolled frustration, unemployment, why I left my previous position, yelling and slobbering

• Cloudy Skies – Thoughts from February 18, 2026

  

  Yesterday, I talked about colors, but I didn’t mention the color white. A study of white reveals that it comprises all the colors. If you don’t know about light, this may not make sense. Before I get too deep into white being made of a rainbow of light, I’ll move on to a specific discussion…

  Brian Kirwan

  September 1, 2026

  Uncategorized

  2026, 3-D painting with precipitation, aggressively honest, cats, Cloud City, cloud shapes, clouds, clouds are always changing, clouds bring rain, clouds in the sky, clouds of heaven, clouds shield us from the sun, collecting rain, colors, creatures appearing in clouds, cumulonimbus clouds, depression, feeling sad, flying saucer, gray clouds, images in clouds, imagination, inspired creation, inspiring clreativity, lenticular clouds, light through the clouds, negative feelings, only seeing clouds, perfectly saucer shaped, phenomenon, rain clouds following sad people, random patterns, Roswell New Mexico, seeing different things in clouds, seemingly random, Star Wars, thoughts, UFO cloud, viewing angle, weather, weather in action, white

• Project Families, Automatic Urinals, and Self-Diagnosed Autism – Thoughts from September 1, 2024

  

  Here we are at the beginning of Patti’s birthday month. I’m still waiting on an itinerary of our Route 66 trip. Does this make me nervous? Of course it does. Patti is very good at keeping me in the dark about specifics. Projects we do together always winds up with me trying to find out…

  Brian Kirwan

  August 5, 2025

  Uncategorized

  2024, anxiety, authentic form of communication, autism, autism spectrum, autistic traits, automatic toilets, automatic urinal, behaviors of autism, birthday month, covering the sensor, depression, doing projects, easily distracted, exact sequence, going to concerts, happier being myself, hiding who I am, lack of control in life, learning to sew, looking people in the eye, loud noises, manual button, masking, mental health, official diagnosis, Patti, problems with crowds, removing myself, Route 66 trip, self-diagnosed autism, sensory issues, sensory overload, special allowances, thoughts, water keeps running, working with wood

• Creativity and Shyness – Thoughts from August 19 and 31, 2024

  

  August 19, 2024 I’ve talked with several people about my throat. I told them about the polyp on my vocal cords. The singer I talked to said she has had them on her vocal cords. She had them removed with surgery. A former nurse said trying the dietary changes made sense before going right for…

  Brian Kirwan

  July 29, 2025

  Uncategorized

  2024, animations, autism, autobiographies, balsa wood, being gay, being shy, building things, creating candles, creating crap, creating songs, creative pursuits, creative skills, depression, dietary changes, drawings, encouraging environment, encouraging parents, encouraging people, experimental ideas, hippies, introduced myself, LGBTQ, musical creations, new person at work, new situations, painting ceramics, polyp on my vocal cord, shyness bubble, signs of autism, singing, singing too much, surgery, thinking is my favorite hobby, thoughts, Thoughts paper, throat problems, vocal cords, Wordscapes, Wordscapes tournament, writing, writings

• Grocery Scanner – Thoughts from December 3 and 4, 2022

  

  December 3, 2022 Patti came in with me to work today so she could go into the park. We stopped by a local Walmarket on the way in. As spell check reminds me, Walmarket is not its real name, but that’s what we call it. I needed blueberries and hair gel. The hair gel was…

  Brian Kirwan

  February 8, 2024

  Uncategorized

  2022, avoid buying organic, bad at suicide, beliefs, blueberries, commiting suicide, competition, depression, escalator, feeling alone, hair gel, hate, helping each other, ignoring mental health, loneliness, loud bang, low self-esteem, major problem in society, man jumped, mental health, mental state, organic, parking structure, Patti, scanning items, self-checkout, selfish act, suicidal thoughts, suicide, thoughts, tragedy, unacceptable item, Walmarket, Walmart Market, wasting time, work

• Breaking Plastic Mirrors – Thoughts from May 22 and 25, 2022

  

  May 22, 2022 Someone asked about the term “reality denier” that I use for people who deny basic realities and behave badly because of it. I use it mainly to call out people’s behavior instead of swearing at them and getting angry. It’s not a perfect term so I usually only use it when I’m…

  Brian Kirwan

  October 19, 2023

  Uncategorized

  2022, accepting reality, anger, angry, angry decisions, anxiety, bad decisions, basic realities, behaving badly, blind to realities, broken mirror, caring about others, conscious decisions, denying realities, depression, embarrassment, emotional, emotions, empathy, funny story, hate, hatred, humor, humorous, ignoring realities, improve other people’s day, jealousy, kindness, logic, loneliness, negative emotion, negative humor, no opposite of hate, non-reality accepter, not dealing with emotions, Other People Exist, people’s behavior, plastic mirror, Reality Acceptance, reality denial, reality denier, recognition, sadness, safety, seven years bad luck, thoughts, tight spot, Truck

• Brian Explains OCD – Thoughts from December 3, 2010

  

  Brian Explains: OCD Obsessive–compulsive disorder (OCD) is defined by Merriam-Webster as a “psychoneurotic disorder in which the patient is beset with obsessions or compulsions or both and suffers extreme anxiety or depression through failure to think the obsessive thoughts or perform the compelling acts.” I don’t mean to brag, but I have several forms of…

  Brian Kirwan

  July 13, 2023

  Uncategorized

  2010, anxiety, ascending order, attempt to control the world, Brian Explains Life, Celebrities with OCD, compulsions, cups, depression, dishes, eating, faux pas, food touching, forks, germs, Howard Hughes, Howard Stern, Howie Mandel, kitchen sink, knives, large to small, lids, life lesson, obsessive thoughts, obsessive-compulsive disorder, OCD, order, Patti, placement, proper order, recluse, rules, small to large, spaghetti, spoons, tapping, Tetris-like, thoughts, wife