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Out on a Live Stage – Thoughts from August 10 and 14, 2022

August 10, 2022 I’m almost glad that the nervousness of performing live was too much for me. If I could do it easily, I would not be as happy and healthy as I am. I don’t like watching live performances so I don’t know why I thought I would ever want to perform live. Whether…
Brian Kirwan
2004, 2022, accepting you are gay, acting, admitting you are gay, anti-gay stance, applying, being honest with yourself, believe in yourself, believing in religion, concert, daily workings, dementia, Disneyland, drunk A-holes, exclusion, family reaction, fast forward, fear, gay, happy, healthy, illogical, ingoring your surroundings, live events, live performances, live shows, living a lie, misconceptions, my body is just a meat sack, nervousness, not pleasurable, performing live, rejected, religion, short thought, singing, South Park, supernatural being, telling jokes, thoughts, Thoughts from Life blog, Thoughts papers, tour of nowhere, understandable but sad, valuing religion over people, voice performance, volume, work, writing -
Toys and Charlie Manson – Thoughts from August 7 to 9, 2022

August 7, 2022 Today’s Thoughts paper is brought to you by sleep. I’m looking forward to getting some tonight. I’ve dropped a lot of things today. Being tired will do that to you. I’m too tired to have many thoughts. I promise to have more tomorrow. August 8, 2022 I was going to work today…
Brian Kirwan
2022, action figures, anxiety, anxiety provoking, as a kid, Charles Manson, Charlie, Charlie Manson, daughter, driving down the street and back, dropping things, faded words, freeway, granddaughter, Harley Davison motorcycle, hateful words, living with mom, local Charlie, Manson died, middle-aged man, mobile home, multiple toys, no job, no one would employ him, one toy, open the box, out-of-control hair, parents took me to Toys R Us, regret, research, riding a bike, sad future, screaming obscenities, selling drugs, short motorcycle rides, sleep, stuffed animals, thoughts, Thoughts paper, tired, too tired, tough decisions, toys, Toys R Us, Toys R Us truck, urging his suicide, video games, wrong decision -
Men’s Restrooms – Thoughts from August 2 and 3, 2022

August 2, 2022 As I was driving to work today, I saw a truck with a bumper sticker that said, “Dirty Hands Clean Money.” For the longest time, I could only read the first three words. I did not know what the last word could be. The one thing I thought of was “Heart.” I…
Brian Kirwan
2022, accusations, All-American Asphalt, asphalt, bumper sticker, capitalism, climate change, clothing line, comment, competitive crap, convicted, dirty hands, Dirty Hands Clean Money, dirty jobs, dirty money, disgusting A-holes, fame seeking parents, fasten his belt, Heart, horrible American company, male membership card, men’s restroom, Michael Jackson, nationalism, not washing your hands, pedophilia, podcast, pride, radio, restroom, scared, single person restroom, soap, stall, the news, thoughts, Truck, unclean, uncomfortable, weird, words are not facts, work truck -
X Chromosome – Thoughts from July 30 and August 1, 2022

July 30, 2022 The past few days have been weird, but not in a good way. I had to sit still on a freeway for hours and eventually get off the freeway by driving the wrong way. I gained 3.7 pounds in one day (not my personal record, but close). The day before, I got…
Brian Kirwan
1991, 2022, advantages and disadvantages, airport run, autism, autistic, blog, book, by subject, capable, caring about other people, chromosomes, chronilogical order, context, crying, entertaining, female, feminine qualities, freeway, future note, gay relationships, glasses, hang ups, having kids, I’m a different person, intimate relationships, kids, male, monogamy, mutated, mutated X chromosome, not wired for monogamy, podcast, polygamy, reading, reality is my friend, relationships, scientist, sex, shut down, still on the freeway for hours, stories, superpower, theoretical gold star, theoretical internet money, thoughts, Thoughts from Life, Thoughts papers, we are not wired at all, weight, weird days, writing, wrong way, XX, XY -
Test Results – Thoughts from July 26 and 28, 2022

July 26, 2022 I really should save this thought until tomorrow, but I had it today so screw you, Tomorrow. It involves the number 27. I think we should declare the age 27 as the early change of life. I got married when I was 27 so that was a definite change for me. Many…
Brian Kirwan
2022, 27, about this test, accepting of emotions, age 27, blood in the stool, celebration, coincidence, commemorate July 27th, computer glasses, crying, died at age 27, doctor, extra pair of glasses, eye doctor, famous people, feces sample, future note, home office, learning, lesson, life events, mail, major life decision, married, movie stars, negative results, new glasses, no written thoughts, Patti, results, rock stars, scientific, stool, sweat and think, sweaty job, tears, test, test results, thoughts, Thoughts papers, trauma, twenty-seven, why, woman, write more, writing

