Tag: shyness

• Ignoring Other People and My Moth Friend – Thoughts from May 20 and 21, 2023

  

  May 20, 2023 I’m on day six of eight days of working the same earlier shift. It’s only two hours off the shift I enjoy better, but it’s an annoying two hours. The most annoying part about it is feeling tired every day. If I told you when I was coming to work, you would…

  Brian Kirwan

  May 23, 2024

  Uncategorized

  2023, abnormal jobs, autism, being an atheist, bored or freaked out, boring people, carefull word choice, caring about other people, catering stories to the group, connecting to other people, conversations about religion, coworker, drumming in the air, exciting people, experiencing the world, ignoring other people, ignoring the world, incidence, interesting people, little creatures, looking strangers in the eye, loud clothes, moth, moth on my windshield, movements as communication, my Monday, my moth friend, no beliefs, observations, Other People Exist, people’s stories, shyness, snoozes, stimulus, storytelling, the early shift, thoughts, tired, unpleasantness of the world, videoing, weird stories, work

• The Reality of Shyness – Thoughts from July 17 to 19, 2022

  

  July 17, 2022 It’s the birthday of the place I work. We have food trucks all over and they are giving burgers to all the employees. I gave my meal away to another employee and found out it was his third of the day. Someone else brought in donuts. I ate my regular food because…

  Brian Kirwan

  November 9, 2023

  Uncategorized

  2022, alone, antidote to anxiety is knowledge, autism, book, burgers, complex realities, control myself, conversation about nothing, conversations, conversations with women, diverse knowledge, diverse people, donuts, favorite bosses were female, female teachers, food trucks, free food, genuine conversation, hate, hearing conversations, ignorance, knowledge, male teachers, men, misogyny, most men, my happiest and healthiest self, no point to the conversation, no politics, no religion, no sports, opposite of me, perspective on life, power and money, pro-science atheists, Reality Acceptance, reality denial, relatable topics, Sesame Street, Sesame Street for adults, shy, shy kid, shyness, social monster, teach about reality, TED Talk, The Highly Sensitive Person, the unknown, thoughts, Thoughts papers, trust women, website, welcoming, women, worries of youth, young and shy

• Fourth of July Fireworks – Thoughts from July 3 and 5, 2022

  

  July 3, 2022 Yesterday was my birthday, and I celebrated with sushi and gambling. It was the big five two. It was my last day of being off from work with COVID. I’m back to work today. I always worry that my ID won’t work when I’ve been off for a while, but it worked…

  Brian Kirwan

  October 26, 2023

  Uncategorized

  2022, America, arguing, Beatrix, behavior, beliefs, birthday, boring conversation, cats, celebrating, certain subjects, Christians, confused, conversation, COVID, dangerous, extroverts, extroverts annoy me, facts, fireworks, fireworks in the sky, first fireworks, Fourth of July, freaked out, gambling, good Christian, good person, illegal, interesting subjects, introduce myself, known facts, less shy, logical, Luna, mental note, modern America, my ID, neighborhoods, new employees, new people, Patti, people’s baggage, people’s beliefs, playing fair, pride, pride is not good, proud of America, Quest, Scout, Scout staring at Quest, seven deadly sins, shy, shy people, shyness, sushi, the littles, thoughts, topics of conversation, undeserved pride, uninteresting conversations, useless topics, white men, Willow, worst behaved Americans

• Rockstar Dreams – Thoughts from May 7 and 8, 2022

  

  May 7, 2022 May the seventh be today. I cleared out my office yesterday enough to get easily to my guitar. I still haven’t played it, but I can as soon as I add a new high string and tune it. It’s been a while, so I’ll have to remind myself how to do it.…

  Brian Kirwan

  October 12, 2023

  Uncategorized

  2022, being shy, believing in magic, brutally honest, calendar, Chewbacca height, cleared out, connection points, deafness, dog, Facebook, fighting as kids, George, hating others, knowing magic is real, lack of embarrassment, limitations, Magical Misfits, my deafness, my guitar, my office, my songs, negativity, Neil Patrick Harris, new high string, nothing, on my good side, playing, racist, Reality Acceptance, red flags, rockstar dreams, saying inappropriate things, scheduling posts, Seinfeld, show about nothing, shy me, shyness, significant other, Sister, speaking softly, super religious, take offense, tall guy, thoughts, Trump fan, tune, understanding magic, website, website management, Wizardland, working

• Restroom Habits – Thoughts from March 6, 2022

  

  I have to write immediately because it just happened. Two things I question in the men’s restroom habits just happened one after the other. Someone came into the restroom and washed his hands. When he was done, he walked over to the urinal. This is just the first thing I have questioned in the past.…

  Brian Kirwan

  September 7, 2023

  Uncategorized

  2022, autism, behaving badly, beliefs, calm person, cranky, credit cards, Every Day is an Atheist Holiday, evil is not real, grumpy faces, habits, healthier, learning to restroom, less aggressive, logical thinking, men’s restroom, mouth nasty things, not wearing masks, organization, Patti, peeing, Penn Jillette, profanity, profundity, put things away, restroom habits, restroom routines, shyness, the hole in your underwear, thoughts, Thoughts paper, undoing your belt before urinating, unhealthy-looking people, wallet, washing hands, wearing masks, weird things

• Eye Twitching Holidays – Thoughts from November 17 to December 18, 2003

  

  November 17, 2003 My system had a minor crash again. I had worked on a song (a sad song), and it suddenly wouldn’t let me logon to Windows. After much ado, it’s back, but I’ve been saving all my songs in multiple locations – which I should have done before, but at least I’m doing…

  Brian Kirwan

  May 18, 2023

  Uncategorized

  2003, alcoholism, always driving, animation, assisted living, back up, bad eating, being driven, California Adventure, Cameron, cause of death, Christmas, computer, dad, death certificate, Disneyland, driving, eye twitching, Grand Californian, Grand Canyon, holidays, mom, my songs, nephews, nerd, Nightmare Before Christmas, Paradise Pier Hotel, Patti, shy, shyness, Sister, smoking, soundtrack, stress, stress free, stressing out, system crash, Thanksgiving, the boys, thoughts, twins, Twisted Land of Oz

• Thoughts from September 21 and October 4, 2001

  

  September 21, 2001 Today, I feel alone and pathetic. Every Friday at work, two co-workers go to Denny’s and mainly get Grand Slams. Most weeks, I’ve already had breakfast. This Friday, I specifically didn’t eat breakfast so I could take part in the Grand Slam festivities. An hour after everyone else had eaten, I got…

  Brian Kirwan

  March 16, 2023

  Uncategorized

  2001, Denny's, Disney Animation Studios, emoting, feeling alone, feeling pathetic, honesty, insecurity, serious thoughts, shyness, silence, that guy, The Animation Academy, thoughts

• Thoughts from August 14 and 28 1995

  

  (Future note: The following two entries from 1995 are great examples of my nerdiness, shyness, and continuing pursuit of creative interests that never seemed to lead to an artistic career. I think my shyness was the main reason for my only pursuing creativity as a hobby. On a positive note, I made some real social…

  Brian Kirwan

  January 12, 2023

  Uncategorized

  1995, artistic career, Best Buy, change, comedy sketches, Comp USA, computer, computer stuff, Corel Draw, creative interests, future greatness postponed, glitches, looking approachable, nerdiness, old mouse, pen mouse, shyness, talking to people, thoughts, Windows 95