The Reality of Shyness – Thoughts from July 17 to 19, 2022

July 17, 2022

It’s the birthday of the place I work. We have food trucks all over and they are giving burgers to all the employees. I gave my meal away to another employee and found out it was his third of the day. Someone else brought in donuts. I ate my regular food because I can control myself at work. Free food is not free of calories. Controlling myself is easy when other people are around. My biggest problem comes when I’m alone.

I was listening to a book on misogyny and wondered if I’m actually from another planet. Everything they said that most men do was the opposite of what I do and how I think. They said most people like their male teachers more than their female ones. I have had good female and male teachers, but I remember more female teachers who were my favorites. My favorite bosses have been female, my best friend (and wife) is female, and I trust females much more than males. This is the opposite of how most people feel, apparently.

One of my early Thoughts papers reminded how shy I was when I was younger. I heard more conversations than I took part in. I always noticed that male conversations went off the rails right off the bat. There would be entire conversations that said absolutely nothing. They said words, but there was no point to the conversation. Men used their words to prove how macho they were. It was just regurgitated patriarchal crap that was passed down to them from previous generations. Conversations with women are much more enjoyable than with men. Men talk about boring things I don’t give a crap about. Women can talk about boring things too, but I can at least relate to the subjects.

We need a Sesame Street for adults to teach us about reality. I might have said this before, but it is worth repeating. Most adults have fed themselves with so much reality denial that they need a refresher course in what is real. No religion, sports, or politics would be in the adult version of Sesame Street. We could talk about being kind to others, how to have a genuine conversation, and how you can tell if something is based on actual information. They would only present hate as a cautionary tale to be avoided. Every show would present a different perspective on life around the world from real diverse groups of people. They would feature no rich people, leaders, or people with power. Power and money separate people from reality. The hosts would all be pro-science atheists from diverse backgrounds and knowledge. The end of the show would feature a reality accepting tip to implement into your life immediately.

July 18, 2022

An older coworker was talking to me about how different we were when we were young and how age removes many of the worries of youth. I think the greatest antidote to anxiety is knowledge. Most of my anxiety when I was young was from the unknown. Actually, it was from interacting with other people who I didn’t know. I still have problems going to a place I’ve never been and talking to people I’ve never met. Knowledge is much more comfortable for me than ignorance.

July 19, 2022

I got an email from someone at Reality Acceptance enquiring about writing articles about health for the website. It’s the first email I’ve received about Reality Acceptance that is not just an ad for SEO services. I looked at the website associated with the website and it looks legit. I’ve always wanted to work with other people. Hopefully, this is the first step to doing that. Part of me is staying skeptical. I don’t want to find out that the person who wrote to me is spiritual.

I was talking with people in the office at work the other day. We were talking about being shy. I said I was very shy when I was younger, but I’m not really shy now. One of the new people said it was nice how I welcomed him when I first saw him. I’m listening to a book called The Highly Sensitive Person. In it, the author says people should stop using the term shy. It is too general to describe any one person’s situation accurately. I agree. Shyness did not really explain my symptoms as a kid. I think even autism didn’t fully explain what I went through then. Like everything in reality, it was complex.

Today, I’m just a social monster. I talk to people I don’t know almost every day. I guess I should start working on my TED Talk now. That has always been a part of the plan in my head for Reality Acceptance. I cracked the code on being my happiest and healthiest self so why wouldn’t I want to share that? I would have to do many other things before that, though. One of those things would be getting myself back into shape.