Well, I wrote to Victor Navone regarding Alien Song the other day, and he actually wrote me back. He basically said, if my work is strong enough, anything is possible. Even with my lack of experience in the animation world, I can make it. I am continuing every night to work on Alien Concept. I got Premiere 6.0, and it is helping enormously for both my confidence (I can see the continuing product as it goes along) and my completeness (I have edited together the entire opening). I also completed the Alien Concept trailer. I would like to have created actual animations for the singing duck and the blinking dude, but I put words over them instead with clips from the completed film. It’s a good thing. (Future note: I didn’t say it was a great thing, but good is good enough. A complete something is always better than an incomplete nothing.)
I had trouble recently with life. I wasn’t happy. I don’t really want to explain the exact nature of my unhappiness, but I believe it was a phase (or cycle) that I’m over now. If I’m going to prove I can make it, I just have to make it. I don’t expect people to believe my work is great without them seeing it for themselves. Not only do I need feedback on my work, but I need to complete it for real and not just in my head. I believe my artistic work is always going to be a work in progress, but I should have a complete product to show people.
It has been some time since I have seen my parents. I’m not saying they’re missing, or I’ve gone blind. I’m just saying I haven’t been over to their house to visit them in some time. Patti and I have gone over twice to their house, and they either weren’t home or were asleep. I called after we went over and they were asleep. My mom said we could have just woken them up, but I have a fear of sleeping people. I don’t like to be woken up when I’m sleeping, and they never seem happy to be woken up by me. I would like to show them the progress on the trailer for Alien Concept and some other things. I don’t need things to show them to talk to them, but things give a purpose to our meetings that makes it easier than going over with nothing. Holidays are usually a good excuse for getting together. Even then, there is a great deal of small talk I have to do that I’m not good at. We will probably see my parents this weekend, so I can make sure they still exist and I’m not blind.
(Future note: I feel like this Brian person writing these words is a different person than who I am today. This thirty-one-year-old version of me is refreshingly naïve and insecure. It wasn’t refreshing when I was going through this time in my life. I know what trouble I was having in my life at this time, but I will let my future-past self reveal it in his own time. People who say they want to live their lives over are forgetting the problems they had to deal with. If I lived my life over, I wouldn’t be the person I am today. People who live trouble-free lives are boring. All of my stories came out of problems in my life. My most entertaining stories come out of me screwing up my life. I am all of my screw-ups. Without them, I might be a politician now. No one likes politicians in real life. They’re boring and no fun to be around—like rich people.)
I’ve been too normal in the preceding paragraphs, so I’m going to be abnormal in this paragraph. That said, I can’t really think of anything abnormal to talk about. Let me think for a minute. (Pause) Okay, I thought of something that, at the very least, is gross. Recently, my nose has been filled with an excessive amount of mucus. It’s not attractive mucus, either. It’s ugly, dried-up mucus flowing from my nose in flakes. Every day, I’m worried at one point or another I have pieces of dried snot hanging from the edge of my nose. I’m thinking of carrying a mirror with me. I’d be too embarrassed to use it, though, unless I kept it in my pocket and looked at my nose in the restroom. (Future note: I find it funny that I would go to the restroom to use a mirror from my pocket when there is a mirror in the restroom.) The worst part of the whole thing is, because it’s dry and usually crusted to the side of my inner nose, I can’t just blow my nose and get rid of it. The only thing I can do is dig deep into my nose and try to work the pieces out. This is difficult to do if I’m sitting at my desk at work. It’s physically possible, but not socially acceptable. Sometimes, the pieces get stuck to the hairs in my nose and won’t come out unless I bleed to death getting them out. There’s no real point or suggestion to myself in this paragraph. It just is the best paragraph it can be.
I don’t have anything else gross to talk about, so I’ll stop.
Thoughts from Life 
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