September 3, 1997 – Thoughts from Life 6

Kings and queens ruling their royal subjects are the substance of fairy tales. Fairy tales are where they need to stay. I don’t want to turn on my television news and hear about a princess who died because, as far as I’m concerned, they are all dead. The days of having royal weddings and other ceremonies at the expense of the people should be over. Some may argue we need these rituals. For what reason, I cannot guess. Whatever the reason, it is not justifiable with the state of financial affairs in most countries of the world today. America is becoming overrun by ceremonies. We don’t have kings or queens, but we certainly have the pomp and circumstance kings and queens are famous for. If a huge rock band plays a concert in a stadium, the event pays for itself through ticket and album sales. The people who want to see the concert pay for it. If the president goes into office, a huge ceremony takes place at the direct and indirect expense of people who may or may not have voted him. Should these people have to pay for this ceremony?

If you go to see The Rolling Stones in concert and they have the remaining members of the Grateful Dead play instead, is the money the audience paid nonrefundable? Unless the stadium owners want a riot on their hands, it is. When we vote in elections, the candidates should not only give their platforms on abortion, the deficit, and family values, they should be forced to tell how much they are going to spend of taxpayers’ money on the various ceremonies taking place in their administrations. If Clinton wants to charge money to stay at the White House to offset the costs of all the ceremonies, good. We need more people in high office who will economize. Just a suggestion from a guy who would rather sell tickets than get voted into office.

Raising kids is difficult, depending upon what kids you have. Most difficult kids came from difficult circumstances. Their environment developed their behavior. In rare circumstances, a difficult child comes out of capable, stable parents. Children can have physical, emotional, or mental problems which cause them to have difficulties in life beyond normal childhood pressures. Even in these cases, a reason for the bad behavior can be theorized. There are reasons for everything that happens. We may not know or be able to know what those reasons are, but they always exist. Even God has a reason for being invented. He, it, or she gives the fearful something to grasp onto. This may sound childish (and it is), but that’s what a belief in God is – a big black hole of nothing. Next time I’ll try to make my point more straightforward about my feelings toward this God thing. It all goes to show you, though. Children have to grow up and stopping a belief in God is part of that process. Okay, I made a loose connection between raising kids (which actually turned into a difficult kid thing) and the God thing (which never really turns into anything). So, sue me.

People are much too willing to take others to court these days (unless there’s bad weather). If you find out you have a legitimate case against someone, it’s as if you’re waiting for an appearance on the Lotto’s Big Spin. People get huge sums of money for making a claim of wrong-doing against someone else. Truth and actual justice is something people can take or leave (depending upon whether they are receiving any compensation from the case). The real issue is how much am I going to get paid and how many taxes are they going to take from it?

And what about taxes? People who make a great deal of money complain about how many taxes they have to pay. I will tell you right now, if I’m making two hundred thousand to one million dollars (depending upon inflation), I will not complain about the taxes I have to pay. Many other countries have much higher taxes than we do in the United States. Besides, when I get a paycheck, I don’t care what the gross income actually is. The check or checks I take home and put in the bank each month are what I consider my income. It’s the entire income of which I have to spend for my household. My net income (in the world according to Brian) is the income I have to spend after paying for bills, gas, food, and taxes. Right now, my net income is just about as close to zero as you can get. You don’t see me complaining … much … okay, outside my family. If you saw me complaining, it would be about stupid people on the freeways, highways, and roads.

Stupid people should not be allowed to get behind the wheel of a vehicle. The written and driving test are obviously not doing their required jobs. People are still getting on the road who have no idea what they’re doing. Others know the rules but choose not to follow them. The word teenager comes to mind. Teenagers are still testing the bounds of the world. It can almost be accepted by them because of their age and lack of worldly knowledge. Adults, however, are a different lighting fixture. Here are some rules I’d like to emphasize for those adult idiots out there who don’t know how to drive:

1. If you’re changing lanes on the freeway, always (and I don’t mean when you feel like it) signal. I think cars should be equipped with cameras. When someone doesn’t signal (or breaks one of the other rules yet to come in my list), a shot of them not signaling should be able to be taken and used to give them a ticket. At the very least, their names should be put under “idiots” in every local newspaper.

2. When you’re in the fast lane of the freeway or road, drive fast. If you don’t feel like driving fast, don’t drive in the fast lane. Here’s a clue that you’re driving too slow in the fast lane. Look to your right. If several cars are passing you by in the slower lanes, join them until they are passing you on the left.

3. While on the road, drive your car. Don’t shave, fix your hair, talk on the phone, get something out of the back seat, or play with your pet goat. If you have to talk to someone in the car with you, don’t divert your eyes from the road. Eye contact is a bad thing in this case. The one rule to follow at all times is keep your eyes and mind more on the road and other cars than on anything going on in your car. To be quite specific, if you have to discipline your kids in the car, pull off to the side of the road (or, at least, the slow lane). Don’t show your kids that it’s okay to yell and drive at the same time.

4. I don’t really have a fourth rule, but I’ve always noticed that four items look more like a large list than do three.

Dinosaurs should or should not be brought back to life? Care or care not? Science fiction fans everywhere have an opinion on this and other quasi-scientific subjects. I am, when it comes right down to it, a science fiction fan. Some people don’t like the entire genre. Some people have never seen Star Wars or any of its sequels. Some people recently got married to me. Yes, my wife has never seen Star Wars. She was in the prime years for seeing Star Wars and she rented it on video once (before I knew her) and still never saw over 15 minutes of the film. I will get her to see Star Wars all the way through one of these days (especially since she kidnapped me into going to a Garth Brooks concert). Reality shows are more her cup of Dr. Pepper. We’re opposites in this way. I hide from life in fantasy worlds while she hides from life in other people’s realities. We both like Beavis and Butthead, though. I don’t really know what kind of genre connection that gives us. We like to laugh (most people, of course, enjoy frowning). In a world of laughter and a world of tears, there’s so much we’re after at this time of year. It’s time we’re aware of what we did not care. It’s a bad ass world, after all.

I exercise tact when I’m talking to people. I don’t feel comfortable asking embarrassing or uncomfortable questions unless I know the person well. Howard Stern uses no tact when thinking of questions for his guests. Rosie O’Donnell usually uses more than enough tact when talking to her guests. I enjoy both hosts and both of their shows. I don’t find Howard offensive; I find him refreshingly honest and truthful. On the other side of the dial, I don’t find Rosie boring, I find her refreshingly pleasant. Entertainment is entertainment. Rosie’s show is like a good party that serves good snacks. Howard’s is like a party that’s still going at 3 am when the conversation is just getting lively, but the drinking has been light. People’s real feelings come out in these late-night conversations. I don’t like watching ice skating, rodeos, line dancing, or fishing, but, if someone wants to watch them, I think those shows might as well exist so those people can watch them. I think the phrase “turn the dial” expresses my feelings best. I’m tired of watching this paragraph so I’m going to switch the channel.

I’m not in a scene. Every famous older person has a story about the scene that existed when they were younger, helping them develop their skills and talents. There’s more general scenes, such as the hippie scene or club scene, and more specific scenes, such as the Fourth Street scene (sometimes called a gang) or the chess club at Rogers High School scene. I don’t go anywhere and don’t do anything. I’ll never get what I want out of life without being a part of a scene. I could create my own scene from scratch. I could start something new and get a few of my friends (maybe even family because I don’t have that many friends) to follow me in that scene. Eventually, other people would join the group and a scene would be born. It’s not an exact plan, but I think it could lead to something.

I’m done.

I was done with that last paragraph, but not quite done with paragraphs in general. I just have one more thing to say. I’m really done now. Don’t get me wrong, that last paragraph ended the paper with a good touch, but it wasn’t the final thing I had to say. The next sentence will be the final thing I have to say. Well, this was going to be the final thing I had to say, but I just wanted to point out it is not the final thing I have to say. I’ll write again. I’m just not going to write anymore right now. Therefore, there won’t be any more writing on this paper when you read it, except, of course, the writing that I’m doing right now. This is most definitely the last sentence of this paper.